Ranking Every Doctor Who Christmas Special

Season's greetings, reader!

As the Yuletide season is upon us, I'm cranking up the Christmas-themed lists. This week, I'm ranking all 14 of the annual Christmas specials that my favorite time-and-space-traveling, ultra-alien-yet-ultra-British, child-friendly-yet-occasionally-creepy-and-frightening, cheesy-and-comical-yet-somehow-extremely-deep, over-50-year-old series Doctor Who (1963-1989; 2005-Present) has done ever since its 2005 revival. I've ranked the episodes based on a combination of two factors: A) how good television it is, and B) how well it works as a Christmas episode. This means that the few ones that were absolute masterpieces of emotional power but sort of forgot that they were supposed to be Christmas-y won't be quite on the top places despite their placement as some of the show's greatest moments, and that the ones that hit the holiday spirit well, but with crappy and lazy storytelling, won't also be in the top tier. I've excluded the two latest New Years' specials, since they have strayed so far from the holiday theme and are Christmas/New Year's specials in name only.

Allons-y!

14. The Return of Doctor Mysterio (2016)

"Things end. That's all. Everything ends, and it's always sad. But everything begins again too, and that's...always happy. Be happy. I'll look after everything else"

No Doctor Who Christmas episode is completely bad, as can be witnessed by these brilliant words by the Twelfth Doctor (Peter Capaldi) being the sole saving grace of an otherwise pretty terrible holiday special. While Doctor Who has always drawn some parallels to the superhero genre, with its combination of witty banter and sci-fi shenanigans, it has always set itself apart by focusing more on fun life lessons and less on action and superpowers. Therefore, the show's take on the superhero genre in this episode feels a bit clumsy, and the Christmas setting often seems like an afterthought. Oh well, they can't all be winners.

13. Resolution (2018)

"Humanity will surrender"

"They really won't, trust me. I've seen them in action. They've fought off so many things, including the worst of their own people. They're really stubborn. Have you not worked that out yet?"

Like a few of these entries, Resolution is technically a New Year's Special, but as they've been released in place of Christmas Specials on the years that didn't have a typical Xmas adventure in December, I'm lumping them all together for the purpose of this list.

Resolution was the first holiday special of the Thirteenth Doctor's (Jodie Whittaker) era, and like most episodes from this opinion-splitting set of seasons, the main character is easily the highlight. Chris Chibnall's writing is quite generic and forgettable, but damn, Whittaker does absolutely everything in her power and then some to make the episode watchable and even enjoyable to a degree, with her delightful quips and exquisite delivery of lines reflecting the wonderful quirky optimism that was always a central ingredient of the series.

12. The Runaway Bride (2006)

"Where am I?"

"Inside the TARDIS"

"The what?"

"The TARDIS!"

"The what?"

"The TARDIS!"

"The what?"

"It's called the TARDIS!"

"That's not even a proper word! You're just saying things!"

The Christmas special from between seasons 2 and 3 of the revival is best remembered for being the debut appearance of Donna Noble (Catherine Tate), who would go on to be one of the tenth Doctor's (David Tennant) chief companions. I never was a huge Donna fan, but it's undeniable that her chemistry with Tennant's Doctor character is quite amusing. Their dynamic is the highlight of this otherwise quite cheesy and forgettable Christmas special.

11. The Doctor, The Widow and the Wardrobe (2011)

"A fairy land? Oh, grow up. A fairy land looks completely different"

The Doctor, The Widow and the Wardrobe may not be television gold by production or writing standards, but it's whimsical and warm enough to work as a delightful Christmas special even if it falls a tad flat when judged as an overall episode of Doctor Who. This adventurous episode hooks you in with its Narnia-esque storyline, and the cozy holiday atmosphere will help you get through the more boring and unnecessary parts. Matt Smith is a delight as always, driving home the fact that this episode is solid yuletide background viewing despite its shortcomings!

10. The Next Doctor (2008)

"Jackson, if anyone had to be The Doctor, I'm glad it was you"

We're slowly starting to get to the good stuff here, although this special gains minus points for its bait-and-switch title - it had already been announced that David Tennant was leaving the show, and thus a Christmas special titled The Next Doctor naturally gave fans the expectation that we'd see Tennant's swan song and the introduction of the 11th Doctor. This would not happen, however, until the next Christmas special (more on that later), meaning that this misleading title was just an attempt to reel viewers in.

However, the episode is good enough that one can't stay too mad. David Morrissey is great in his guest role, and his dynamic with the Tenth Doctor is quite unique. The episode might have its annoying parts, but it feels Christmas-y enough to succeed as a holiday special, not to mention that the episode's heartfelt ending makes it into an overall decent episode of the series. Still pissed off about that title, though!

9. Voyage of the Damned (2007)

"Hang on a minute. Who put you in charge, and who the hell are you anyway?"

"I'm the Doctor. I'm a Time Lord. I'm from the planet Gallifrey in the Constellation of Kasterborous. I'm 903 years old and I'm the man who is gonna save your lives and all 6 billion people on the planet below. You got a problem with that?"

This speech, delivered by the one and only David Tennant, is one of the main reasons that I enjoy this episode despite its less-than-flattering qualities. This mixed bag of a Christmas special is weighed down by the fact that it's riddled with elements of the Russell T. Davies era that I'm not too fond of (the series got a lot better in my opinion once Steven Moffat replaced Davies as showrunner), and pop star Kylie Minogue's guest role as one-time companion Astrid Peth is quite forgettable.

However, there is plenty to enjoy on the Voyage of the Damned: the setting of a spaceship replica of the Titanic (what could go wrong?) is riveting, we're introduced to beloved recurring characters Frame (Russell Tovey) and Wilfred (Bernard Cribbins), and as always, no Doctor Who episode starring the 10th and best Doctor can be completely bad, as David Tennant is a gift from the heavens who can do no wrong. Again, that monologue is so badass!

8. The Time of the Doctor (2013)

"I will not forget one line of this, not one day, I swear. I will always remember...when the Doctor was me"

The Tenth, Eleventh and Twelfth incarnations of The Doctor have all ended their runs in the title role with a Christmas episode. These three episodes were very hard to insert into the ranking, as they all suffer from the "Great as a TV episode, but not especially successful as a Christmas episode" dilemma to some degree - after all, giving an emotional send-off to a beloved character doesn't exactly scream "Happy holidays!". This is especially evident in Matt Smith's swan song, as the yuletide setting feels like a mere afterthought (a planet called Christmas? Really?).

Still, The Time of the Doctor is such a brilliant episode of Doctor Who that it deserves to be in the list's middle section. The Eleventh Doctor gets the sendoff he deserves, in a tour-de-force performance by Smith ranging from the flimsy and quirky moments that made us fall in love with his take on the character to the dramatic and explosive monologues that gave the actor such critical acclaim for his time as the Doctor. The episode's final moments, where we're introduced to the Twelfth Doctor (Peter Capaldi) in a delightfully chaotic manner, will help you wipe away the tears and embrace the next chapter of the series.

7. The Snowmen (2012)

"It's smaller on the outside"

"Okay, that is a first"

If Voyage of the Damned reflected the reasons why I'm not the biggest fan of the era where Russell T. Davies was the showrunner, then The Snowmen does the opposite by reflecting why I love the Steven Moffat era so much. The concept of the episode isn't exactly mind-blowing, but the overall magical silly-yet-weirdly-dramatic-and-epic atmosphere of the Moffat era makes The Snowmen much better than it ought to be.

While the episode's main selling point is the aforementioned atmosphere (it manages to feel very Christmas-appropriate even with the melancholic Victorian color scheme and the spooky horror-ish elements!), there are other things to like as well - the least of which isn't the guest role of Sir Ian McKellen, one of my all-time favorite actors, as the voice of the Great Intelligence. I'm starting to doubt if there are any famous British actors who haven't guest starred in Doctor Who at some point or another.

6. Last Christmas (2014)

"How do you get all the presents in the sleigh?"

"It's bigger on the inside"

Peter Capaldi's first Christmas special as the Doctor is awesome, although I must once again give slight minus points for a misleading episode title - there were no references to WHAM's Last Christmas in this episode. I mean, come on, the opportunity for the double-hearted time lord to say "Last Christmas, I gave you my hearts" was right there.

Other than that, the 2014 Xmas special is an absolute delight. I love the fact that Santa Claus is an existing entity in the Doctor Who universe, because of course he is - and out of all people, Nick Frost was pretty much the best possible casting choice. The episode does a great job balancing the elements that make it into a decent Christmas episode (Santa Claus, the magical ending) and the elements that make into overall good and not over-goofy television (The The Thing (1982) vibes in the 'trapped by scary aliens on an arctic base' narrative are quite creepy), making Last Christmas into a very appropriate yuletide special for the Capaldi era.

5. The End of Time (2009)

"I don't want to go"

David Tennant's final line in the role of the Doctor, which was apparently shot many consecutive times with escalating emotional intensity until they reached perfection, may be the best delivery of a line I've seen from any actor. While the two-parter The End of Time is the darkest of this bunch and occasionally forgets that it's a Christmas special (well, Part 1 is a Christmas special and Part 2 a New Years' special, but I'm counting them as whole here), it's such a masterclass in good television that I couldn't have it outside my top five. If a snowy Christmas setting and occasional holiday music are enough to make an episode into good Christmas viewing for your taste, then might as well watch an episode that is absolute television dynamite beyond its Xmas setting, right?

I reckon I've made it pretty clear that Tennant is my favorite out of all the Doctors, and his final episode is an emotionally loaded swan song. He goes up against old nemesis The Master (John Simm), after which we see him say his prolonged goodbyes to the various companions and friends he had over his tenure as The Doctor, as Murray Gold's extremely sentimental composition Vale Decem rocks the soundtrack. For an actor that made the role his own like no other, it's fitting that Tennant's final moments as the Doctor are a regeneration of unforeseen emotional power, from the dramatic final line to the fact that he bursts into flames nearly destroying the TARDIS in the process, to the backdrop of equally bombastic music. Tears.

4. The Husbands of River Song (2015)

"How do you know me?"

"Well, it's a tiny bit complicated. People usually need a flowchart"

I'm so glad that the lovable, well-written recurring character River Song (Alex Kingston) returned for one last time in the Capaldi era. It's great to see her interacting with the Twelfth Doctor, and the episode's ending will tug at your heartstrings.

Beyond the episode's emotional importance as the final chapter of the River saga, it's also a damn fine Christmas episode, with its light and zany overall feel. Christmas Day is celebrated on a remote human colony in space, including shenanigans from robot bodyguards and comedy antlers all the way to Matt Lucas's beloved character Nardole having a nice supporting role and Greg Davies being wonderfully over-the-top as a villain called King Hydroflax. It's all pretty great.

3. Twice Upon a Time (2017)

"I've got a few things to say to you. Basic stuff first: Never be cruel, never be cowardly, and never ever eat pears! Remember, hate is always foolish, but love is always wise. Always try to be nice, but never fail to be kind"

Out of the three Christmas specials that have done double duty as regeneration episodes, Peter Capaldi's final episode Twice Upon a Time is easily the most Christmas-y. In addition to it being the Twelfth Doctor's swan song, this was also Steven Moffat's final episode as showrunner, and the magical writer pulled off one last trick: he finally cracked the code of how to make such an episode into a proper Christmas special while also feeling like an appropriately emotional goodbye to this version of the Doctor.

The whole ordeal is very bittersweet. The 'death' of Capaldi's character is imminent, but a whole lot of fun is had before we get there, as he goes on an adventure with the First Doctor (played here by David Bradley, who channels William Hartnell's original take on the character brilliantly). For those who haven't seen the episode, or maybe want to re-watch it and don't remember every twist, I won't spoil just what is done with the episode's historical setting, but they chose the best possible moment from history to be the setting for Twelve's last stand. It feels Christmas-appropriate to the maximum, while also moving fans such as myself to tears as the context is so powerful and so fitting for this particular version of the character.

The final moments of this episode will also go down in history, as we're introduced the Thirteenth Doctor - played by Jodie Whittaker, the first woman to grace the role!

2. A Christmas Carol (2010)

"Who's she?"

"Nobody important"

"Nobody important? Blimey, that's amazing. You know that in nine hundred years of time and space travel I've never met anybody who wasn't important"

Being a time travel series that does annual Christmas specials, it was only a matter of time that Doctor Who would do their own take on Dickens's Christmas Carol - after all, what better way to show an old Scrooge-like figure their ghosts of Christmas past, present and future, than actually using the TARDIS to take him to see his past, present and future first-hand?

A Christmas Carol is a delightful Christmas special, with a powerful lesson and some whimsical moments of holiday shenanigans. Michael Gambon's guest role is brilliant, Matt Smith is wonderful as ever, and the episode's central love story will melt your heart. Classic yuletide viewing!

1. The Christmas Invasion (2005)

"Look at these people, these human beings. Consider their potential! From the day they arrive on the planet, blinking, step into the sun, there is more to see than can ever be seen, more to do than...no, hold on. Sorry, that's The Lion King"

The very first Christmas special, released between the first and second seasons of the revival, is nothing short of a holiday masterpiece. Not only is it spectacular as a Christmas episode, with its upbeat soundtrack, silly Xmas aesthetic and beautiful ending scene of the Doctor and Rose (Billie Piper) standing in the snow - it's also a fantastic overall episode of Doctor Who while rocking the Christmas atmosphere.

You see, this was David Tennant's first full episode in the role - the previous episode, season 1 finale The Parting of the Ways, had ended with the Ninth Doctor's (Christopher Eccleston) regeneration into his tenth form. For the first two thirds of The Christmas Invasion, the new Doctor is only teased, as he's in a coma and we don't see him hardly at all. You know, the classic Jaws (1975) trick of making the viewer wait for the thing they most want to see.

Then, after the smell of tea brings the Doctor back to consciousness (yes, Doctor Who is about as British as Queen Elizabeth sipping tea with Dame Judi Dench on the set of Downton Abbey), Tennant makes an all-time great entrance that immediately solidified his position as my all-time favorite version of the Doctor. He absolutely steals the show, as the final third of the episode consists largely of a loose monologue, with the Tenth Doctor babbling off on a thousand different topics in a chaotic and quirky manner while defeating the villainous Sycorax in the process. Probably my favorite debut of a new character in anything ever.

Thank you for reading! Tune in next week's Thursday (Christmas Eve's Eve!) for one of the most ambitious posts in the history of my blog, which was also the most painful one to make all the groundwork for (yes, even worse than last week's Bible post). You see - and I'm not really proud of this - I've now watched the Netflix Original Christmas movies. "Which ones, Veikko?". Well, ahem - all of them. All of the Netflix Original Christmas movies. I watched every single one. Next week, you'll see my ranking of this, um, compelling group of films.