Top 15 Movie Musicals

Greetings, reader!

Well, I've done all-time rankings of various genres this fall, and this ought to be the last one of the series for now (I have other themes to explore in December). From a genre very dear to me, these are the all-time greats!

DISCLAIMER: There are a few must-see classics of the genre that I have woefully not seen, as I haven't found them available to watch anywhere in the last years, from streaming service to streaming service or even a quick search of local DVD collections and down-the-rabbit-hole websites. Chief among these are Cabaret and Rent, so if you're wondering why they're not featured, that's why. Tips on where to watch them would be most appreciated!

Here are my honorable mentions: Jersey Boys (2014), Jesus Christ Superstar (1973), Joker: Folie à Deux (2024), Sweeney Todd: The Demon Barber of Fleet Street (2007), The Greatest Showman (2017).

15. Chicago (2002)

This is one of my fiancée's favorite movies, and I can see why. The Best Picture -winning musical is all about flair, showmanship and female empowerment - with a good deal of murder and other crimes to balance it out with some edge. Renée Zellweger and Catherine Zeta-Jones provide absolutely enthralling performances, while the lavish set design and zany showtunes make the aesthetic charming and memorable. And let's not forget about the choreography, which could be argued to be the film's strongest suit, especially in the Cell Block Tango number.

14. Les Miserables (2012)

Oh yes! The film adaptation of the Broadway adaptation of Victor Hugo's classic novel is the very epitome of the revolution-themed musical, sure to inspire the viewer to stand on the barricades and sing songs of liberation. Iconic numbers like I Dreamed a Dream and One Day More come to life in a brilliant fashion, making for one hell of a fist-pumping experience for fans of musicals and/or revolutions.

13. The Sound of Music (1965)

Ah, this is the stuff. Made in the mythical era where American audiences were trusted to realize that the Nazis are the bad guys, this Robert Wise classic gets points for its wholesome-turned-nervewracking plot, the beyond-iconic Julie Andrews performance, and immortal musical numbers like Do-Re-Mi, My Favorite Things and the titular The Sound of Music. A truly beautiful film, this one.

12. West Side Story (1961)

Yeah, a film doesn't win TEN Academy Awards by accident. The film with the all-time fourth-highest Oscar count is a brilliant big-screen adaptation of the Broadway musical created by Jerome Robbins, Leonard Bernstein and Stephen Sondheim. While the 2021 remake by Steven Spielberg does certain aspects better, I do consider the 1961 classic to be the overall better film.

Numbers deeply ingrained in musical history, like Maria, America and Tonight, come to life with stunning choreography, while Natalie Wood and Rita Moreno provide some of musical cinema's all-time acting performances as Maria and Anita, respectively. It's a tale as old as time, and I reckon ol' Shakespeare himself would've been proud of this one.

11. Rocketman (2019)

It might be sacrilege to put such a new and opinion-dividing film ahead of West Side Story, but hey, it's my blog and I make the rules. As a cinematic experience, considering all possible aspects, I enjoy and appreciate this slightly under-the-radar biopic of Elton John even more than many conventionally more-acclaimed musicals.

If you haven't seen Rocketman and are wondering why a biopic is on this list, trust me, it's not a case like Bohemian Rhapsody (2018) where we cut to a bunch of the famous songs in between moments of dialogue - Rocketman truly is a musical in every sense of the word. While it does tell the real-life story of Elton John, it does so in a fantastical manner, bending the rules of reality whenever one of the musical numbers hits, which makes for a magical viewing experience. The musical numbers, and the way they tie the conventions of the genre into John's story while showcasing many of his greatest songs, truly make this film tick, and the end result is fantastic.

10. Grease (1978)

With this one, it's all about the vibes. Watching Grease in retrospect is so weird, because you realize that the characters aren't very likable, the central love story is littered with red flags and the moral of the story is horrible - yet that doesn't change your opinion on the musical very much? Because it was never going to be a thematically powerful story with life-changing lessons, nor does it need to be. The all-time legendary aesthetic, coupled with the songs being just banger after banger after banger, makes for a product that is just so fun to watch and listen to.

John Travolta and Olivia Newton-John are beyond perfect for their roles, and like I said, the songs man, THE SONGS! Grease with Franki Valli performing? Coolness personified. Summer Nights? Classic. Hopelessly Devoted to You? Beautiful. Greased Lightnin? I'm not even into cars, except when this song comes on. You're the One That I Want? One of my all-time favorite musical numbers. We Go Together? Just the ridiculously over-corny and all-out delightful ending track that such a musical calls for.

8. The Rocky Horror Picture Show (1975)

It's queer, it's colorful, it's fun and zany and subversive and weird, it's The Rocky Horror Picture Show. No other picture show is quite like the Rocky Horror one, whether it's thanks to the flamboyant songs by Richard O'Brien, the eccentric performances by legends Tim Curry and Susan Sarandon, or the visual aesthetic and costume design being some of the coolest, most revolutionary and iconic imagery seen in the genre. Side effects may include re-examining your sexuality and not getting Time Warp out of your head for three weeks, but be that as it may, I do recommend this beloved fever dream to everyone!

7. The Blues Brothers (1980)

Very few movies can claim to be even half as cool as this one. Two guys, just out of prison and down on their luck, embark on a mission from God - and lucky for the viewer, that mission is filled with entertaining musical numbers, featuring cameos from the combined star power of Ray Charles, James Brown and Aretha Franklin. Throw in a record-breaking car chase sequence, and you've got yourself a classic.

6. Mamma Mia! (2008)

The thing about Mamma Mia! is that it's probably cinema's best example of low-to-no-stakes storytelling. While there is a plot to keep the viewer engaged, very little goes wrong, with most of the runtime being drama-free and devoted to the characters having a good time. Making such a film is a dramaturgical challenge, but they sure pulled it off, making for one of the least stressful and most fun films ever made.

Also, it's a jukebox musical consisting of ABBA's music, so there's no way it was going to be anything but awesome. The clever arrangements and whimsical choreographies make for an end product that truly does the all-time greatest pop band's music justice.

5. The Meaning of Life (1983)

And now for something completely different. For the theater geek part of me, it feels a bit wrong to rank the third Monty Python film ahead of the likes of Grease and The Rocky Horror Picture Show, because in many ways, it isn't as conventionally good as a musical as those films. But, this is a subjective list, and while the compositions and arrangements of The Meaning of Life aren't quite Oscar-worthy, they do make for a film that I enjoy watching time again, more than almost any other musical.

A good musical can be a great deal of things, and this one succeeds in making one laugh better than all the others, much thanks to the hilarity of numbers like Every Sperm Is Sacred and Galaxy Song. This film is bizarre, unforgettable, surprisingly thought-provoking, and in the end, one of my favorite musicals albeit in an unconventional manner.

5. Les Parapluies de Cherbourg (1964)

Oh, yes. This vintage French film was nominated for five Academy Awards, which is quite the feat for a foreign film in the deeply America-centric Hollywood of the 60's. But it's just that good - the central love story is bittersweet heartbreak, and I love how it doesn't spell out to the viewer exactly how they should be feeling (something American romance films tend to do a bit too much), but rather leaves the emotional takeaway up to multiple interpretations.

But the music itself is an even bigger asset than the deeply emotional plot - the main melody of the song I Will Wait for You, which is also heard in multiple instrumental reprises across the film's score, is one of the most authentically and heart-wrenchingly emotional pieces of melody ever composed. Even before I knew anything about the film and its plot, just hearing that melody always moved me, as there's just something about it that invokes raw emotion on an exceptional level.

4. La La Land (2016)

After all the hype has died down, we cinema enthusiasts must ask ourselves - was La La Land really that good?

Honestly, no. It was better.

While many films seem like a huge and game-changing thing at the time of their release but then lose points in retrospect, this masterpiece by Damien Chazelle did the opposite for me. I definitely enjoyed it and considered it one of the year's best movies, but I wouldn't have put in my top 3 movie musicals of all time. However, as the years have passed, I've realized how much layers there really were...in addition to being an aesthetically pleasing love letter to Hollywood with obviously fantastic costume and set design, it's also a good love story made great by how it ends and how much that says about us humans, our goals and ambitions, and our relationships.

Also, the songs are JUST. SO. FUCKING. GOOD. I swear, every time I listen to Another Day Of Sun, my opinion of not only that song or the soundtrack but of the entire movie seems to move up a notch, as its magical atmosphere seems to have infinite "Damn, I didn't remember it was THIS GOOD!" value.

3. Hair (1979)

Yeah, I'm not a big fan of war. And neither is this movie. For my pacifist soul, Hair is pretty much the most thematically powerful musical one could imagine, with its anti-war message hitting deep to a heartbreaking degree. In addition to the values being on point, the film's hippie aesthetic is fun and memorable, and the musical numbers are on point - very untypical songs for the musical genre, but untypical in a good way, as every track is just so incredibly groovy. The haunting final number The Flesh Failures / Let the Sunshine In will stay with you.

2. tick, tick...BOOM! (2021)

I'm guessing that quite a few fans of the genre liked this film alright, but will wonder at me placing it this high. But, man, tick, tick...BOOM! spoke to me. Like, to a staggering degree. I felt this movie on a level that I have felt only a few others.

First of all, the musical itself was written by Jonathan Larson before his untimely passing, and adapted onto the big screen twenty-five years after his death. The musical is an autobiographical one, and Andrew Garfield's performance as Larson is overwhelming in its vulnerability and raw passion. The musical presents Larson as a geek who spends all his time on ambitious creative endeavors, while being frustrated by the inequalities of the world and the fact that everyone can't be saved, as he over-analyzes everything to a point of philosophical conundrums and rambling stand-up bits so convoluted that the only thing he could do with his thoughts was to write a musical about it. Now, as hard as it might be for people who know me to believe, I saw quite a bit of myself (or at least what I aspire to be) in this, making this into the downright most relatable musical I have ever witnessed.

I also love the unconventional style of the narrative, breaking so many barriers of the musical genre while somehow also managing to feel like the genre in its ultimate, unleashed final form. It's a massive tearjerker, and it will always have a big place in my heart.

1. Moulin Rouge! (2001)

Yeah, this one also just really spoke to me. Moulin Rouge! was a gaping hole in my general education for a long time, until I finally saw it for the first time earlier this year. And by God, it became my favorite in the entire genre.

The chosen songs, from how they fit into the story and themes to how they are arranged, are spectacular. The performances by Ewan McGregor and Nicole Kidman are heart-melting, making for a love story that feels larger than life - and this is further boosted by director Baz Luhrmann's arthouse style, the flamboyant set design, and naturally, the musical numbers. Moulin Rouge! takes everything that is great about the genre, celebrates it and bathes in it, in a manner that would make even La La Land jealous. This chaotic, silly and deeply touching film entertained me and moved me to a profound degree, and has quite a firm hold on this list's #1 spot.

Thank you for reading! Tune in next week as I celebrate Finland's Independence Day with a patriotic post: the top 10 accomplishments of Petteri Orpo's government!

Top 15 Fantasy Movies of All Time

Greetings, reader!

My deep dive into the world of genres continues, with this week's list focusing on my all-time favorite fantasy movies. It turned out to be a more difficult genre to define than I had anticipated, especially as my relationship to fantasy literature (something I've loved ever since I was tiny and that has continued to be a cornerstone for my love of literature) is quite different from my relationship to fantasy movies. When making this list, ranking these films purely based on how good they are as fantasy movies and not as overall cinema, I started to realize that a certain hard-to-define magical feel counts for a lot.

In terms of being a good fantasy movie to my taste, I prefer a film with a simple and only slightly outlandish premise but with a genuinely magical atmosphere thanks to elements like soundtrack and awe, to a film filled with high fantasy elements like dragons and goblins but where the atmosphere is generic. So basically, I ranked these films based on how much it feels like I as the viewer am being whisked away into a magical world, where things can happen that wouldn't happen in real life, because at the end of the day, that's what the genre is all about.

Here are my honorable mentions: Barbie (2023), Big (1988), Hugo (2011), My Neighbor Totoro (1988), The Green Mile (1999).

15. Encanto (2021)

Sometimes, all it takes to stick out of the crowd is a cool approach to the subject of magic. There are plenty of magic films out there, but every now and then a film will come up with its own fresh twist on the concept of magical powers, and that's what Encanto does. It's an animated kids' film that I saw at an adult age, but the way it dealt with its magical premise really resonated with my inner child, which is always a joy.

14. It's a Wonderful Life (1946)

In a way, fantasy elements play a very small part in this timeless classic - yet it's absolutely crucial. We're introduced to it in the very beginning, then we're swept away into non-magical real-world narratives for so long that we forget its existence, until the magic intervenes at a key moment and changes everything. The story of It's a Wonderful Life wouldn't be anything without its fantasy element, something that was quite an uncommon addition to such a human drama in its time, but it worked so well that many have tried to copy it / pay homage to it for decades and decades.

13. Being John Malkovic (1999)

There are many things to love about the approach to fantasy in Being John Malkovic, one of the most creative movies written by the notoriously creative Charlie Kaufman. I mean, the premise alone - instead of coming up with a conventional fantasy idea like "Hey, what if this inanimate object came to life" or "Hey, what if someone woke up with cool new magic powers" et cetera, Kaufman's peculiar brain came up with "Hey, what it a guy found a door at his workplace that serves as a portal into the head of famous actor John Malkovic, so that walking through the door makes you see life through Malkovic's eyes for about 15 minutes and then you're thrown out?". So, uh, points for imagination.

I also absolutely love this film's answer to the classic dilemma of "How will the human characters react to the sudden existence of a fantasy element?". Many films have showcased versions of shock and awe on this matter, some being more 'realistic' in terms of human nature while others go for dramatic above all else - but in this film, everyone is hilariously mundane about it. Various characters react to the portal's existence with "Huh" and an unassuming shrug, and that makes for some spectacular humor.

12. Yesterday (2019)

This is a classic example of a fairly low-key fantasy premise (an individual magical occurrence takes place in an otherwise realistic depiction of 'the real world', and it has fascinating implications) done right. The oddly specific premise is this: for a bizarre and unexplained reason, history and thus our present-day reality is suddenly changed in one major way: The Beatles never existed.

I don't know who came up with this and why, but oh man, it works. As a neat twist, the protagonist of the film is a struggling musician and for whatever reason, he's the only person who can still remember The Beatles from the 'previous timeline'. So, naturally, he writes down all that he remembers from their songs, starts to present them as his compositions, and breaks into stardom. This leads to fascinating ethical dilemmas, thoughtful insights into the music industry, excellent humor, and a beautiful tribute to the greatest rock band of all time. Hats off to the filmmakers for the creative premise, and its brilliant execution.

11. Toy Story (1995)

One of the better instances of the 'what if inanimate object X came to life' narrative, popular in different ways in both the animated kids' movie and the horror genres, the original Toy Story is a whimsical journey.

While both Toy Story 2 and Toy Story 3 could be argued to be better movies than the original, I have the steadfast opinion that as a fantasy movie, the first one works with the most charm. The second film is the franchise's best as an exciting and adventurous kids' movie, while the third one excels in its more dramatic touch and emotionally powerful coming-of-age elements. But the magic is at its very strongest here, when we first see how the toys come to life, and it is a thing to behold.

10. Hocus Pocus (1993)

That special untouchable thing that makes some fantasy films feel more magical than others, a skillful combination of many factors that is hard to define but can be clearly felt by fans of the genre, was arguably at its strongest in the 90's - for whatever reason, that decade had its share of films where the feel of entering a world more magical than ours is strong and lovable. One of the finest examples is the peculiar, 83% comedy 17% family-friendly-horror witch adventure Hocus Pocus. The score, cinematography and costume design make for a perfect feel of magic with a creepy, Halloween-appropriate twist.

9. The Chronicles of Narnia: The Lion, the Witch and the Wardrobe (2005)

Remember what I said earlier about more low-key fantasy films often feeling more authentically magical than high-fantasy films that feel even slightly generic? Because this film, which I chose to represent the cinematic adaptations of C.S. Lewis' The Chronicles of Narnia books because it's the best of the bunch, fits into that dilemma in an interesting manner.

The Lion, the Witch and the Wardrobe is slightly more generic than it had the potential to be, which is why it isn't quite on the level of the best high fantasy movies and television shows. But, it's significantly less generic than many of its counterparts (Eragon, Percy Jackson and so many others come to mind), so that there are many authentically magical moments to enjoy. For the most part, it feels like a very proper adaptation of the magical world of Narnia, with many iconic locations and characters translating beautifully onto the big screen. Apart from the slight sense of "This all could've been even a touch better", it's a great viewing experience for fans of the book, and one of the better high fantasy efforts in cinema.

8. Bridge to Terabithia (2007)

For fans of the fantasy genre, this coming-of-age escapist tale gives us loads of cool creatures and concepts, in a way that makes the viewer feel exceptionally invested in the main characters played by then-teenagers Josh Hutcherson and AnnaSophia Robb (both providing mature, layered and truly magical performances). It's a great film to watch, once (if you know, you know).

7. Last Action Hero (1993)

Back to vintage 90's low-fantasy cinema! Last Action Hero is a prime example of a fantasy premise that is only okay on paper, and should by all accounts make for cheesy B-class cinema - but something in the film's peculiar style just clicked, making it feel just a bit more authentically magical than so many more generic counterparts. It's a subjective thing for sure, but for a viewer like me, the feel of being transported to a magical world via cinema is exceptionally strong here.

It helps that the film is also delightfully entertaining, poking fun at the action genre's tropes via its fantasy premise while also feeling like a love letter to both genres. It's good fun for the whole family, and one of those films that leaves you with a slight sense of real magic.

6. Scooby-Doo 2: Monsters Unleashed (2004)

I will defend this one with my life. Granted, the live-action film adaptations of the Scooby-Doo cartoons are goofy and cheesy (the second film even more than the first), and as an adult I have learned unfortunate facts that blew over my head as a child, like the borderline-fetishized over-sexualization of the female characters (*sighs* in the second film even more than the first). But, if you manage to take it as a product of its time and enjoy the wholesome parts while being painfully aware of the problematic parts, then this silly piece of child-friendly monster mayhem mystery fantasy is a magical experience.

Despite the overall corny style, the fantasy elements feel true - it's probably just because I watched this films several times as a kid who loved fantasy and Scooby-Doo, but even so, watching clips from this film still gives me goosebumps. The build-up and entrance of iconic monster characters like Captain Cutler, Tar Monster and Miner 49er felt so magical and scary (delightfully fun-scary and not real-scary) as a child that it still resonates today.

5. Night at the Museum (2006)

Yeah, I have a weird soft spot for this. I mean, Night at the Museum is a generally liked film and would probably make the "Top 50 fantasy movies of all time" list of hardly any film buff, but I recognize that many would see the all-time top five as a bit of a reach for a film directed by Shawn Levy, starring Ben Stiller, and scoring a 6.5 on IMDB. But, in my defense - I just really like this film!

Again, there's no scientific explanation for why some fantasy films feel more magical than others, and how this subjective factor varies from viewer to viewer. For me, Night at the Museum is quite simply up there with the greats. I won't even call it an overall underrated film, as I acknowledge elements like the humor being fairly lazy and the love story feeling like an unimaginative addition. But, the magic element - the film quite simply succeeds with that. The curious and mysterious score, the use of lighting and cinematography in unveiling the film's premise a bit by bit, it all just works and the end result feels appropriately, well, fantastic.

4. Shrek (2001)

Similarly to the Monty Python placement on my list of the greatest adventure films, as well as Scream among my favorite horror films, this is a tribute to the art of parodying the tropes of a genre while simultaneously managing to be an unironically decent representative of the genre - a tough line to walk. Shrek is essentially a spoof of, as well as a love letter to, the conventions of the fairytale wing of fantasy.

It's all there - the heroic quest by the hero and the sidekick, the goofy royals, the dragons and castles and magic objects and silly creatures et cetera. The end result works on many levels - for kids, it's a great introduction to the genre, and for adults well-versed with the genre, it's a delightful tale poking fun at what fantasy is all about.

3. Jumanji (1995)

I'd be curious to see whether or not this 90's classic hits as hard as it did as a kid, if I were to watch it now (I've only seen it once, and I was very young). My recollection of the original Jumanji is largely that it felt deeply magical, in a somewhat similar manner to other whimsical fantasy films but quite simply on a different level.

Director Joe Johnston utilizes horror-esque elements with a delicate balance that it feels genuinely creepy without being too scary for children, and elements like Robin Williams' performance and James Horner's score do so much heavy lifting to perfect the otherworldly atmosphere. I actually found the somewhat opinion-dividing 2017 reboot to feel surprisingly magical as well, more or less in the vein of the original, but there's still no beating the 1995 edition.

2. Harry Potter and the Prisoner of Azkaban (2004)

For a fan of the genre in my generation, the question was less whether or not my list would include the Harry Potter franchise, and more which instalment of the childhood-shaping film series I would pick to best represent the fantasy element in the Potter films. Wonderfully cast, impeccably scored and skillfully adapted from a series of books so fantastical that they just magically appeared into the world for us to enjoy with no credit due to anyone (at least that's what I've chosen to believe), the Potter films are a blast. And the best of the bunch, at least from the perspective of the fantasy genre, is The Prisoner of Azkaban.

This has a lot to do with the director - four different directors have contributed to the Potter franchise, and while all of them brought their own strengths to the table, Alfonso Cuaron showcased a deeper understanding of the fantasy genre than any other. Chris Columbus brought a wonderfully whimsical family-friendly touch to the two first films, while Mike Newell made things more big-scale and Hollywood for the fourth, and David Yates nailed the darker and more dramatic touch as the franchise matured for films 5-8. But Cuaron, in directing The Prisoner of Azkaban, brought so much attention to detail - the amount of small everyday magic in the background, with pretty much every shot containing something working in a fun and magical fashion, that the Potter world feels even more authentically magical than it does in the other instalments.

1. The Lord of the Rings trilogy (2001-2003)

Yeah, it had to be The Lord of the Rings at #1. You may call it cheating that I'm counting the whole trilogy as one, but really, I couldn't pick one over the other. As movies, I have a clear ranking of the three masterpieces, but ranked as fantasy films, they're all sharing a spot in the God-tier. J.R.R. Tolkien is the greatest fantasy storyteller to ever have lived, and while no movie can quite emulate all that his books accomplished to a 100-percent degree, Peter Jackson's adaptation is as good as it gets, and a large portion of the greatness in the Lord of the Rings books does translate beautifully onto the big screen, and you can't really top that accomplishment as a fantasy filmmaker. Nailing The Lord of the Rings is the Holy Grail.

Howard Shore makes hearts soar with the greatest film score of all time creating the epic atmosphere, while the well-aged visuals and magnificent New-Zealand-nature-utilizing set design bring to life some of the fantasy genre's greatest ideas: the plains of Rohan, the paradise greenery of the Shire, the hidden beauty of Rivendell, the scorching fires of Mordor, not to mention creatures like the Balrog of Morgoth and the Uruk-Hai of Isengard, as well as magic concepts like Gandalf's spells and the enchanting powers of the One Ring. Even the dialogue hits deep in the vein of the genre, as the epic lore of Tolkien's fantasy world is fleshed out for full enjoyment. It's perfection.

Thank you for reading! Tune in next week for my final instalment of this fall's genre series - the top 15 movie musicals of all time.

At the risk of missing the point of relevance by about 15 years; here's my ranking of the Twilight films

Greetings, reader!

Well, the day finally dawned that I got around to watching the Twilight movies. They were never really a part of my childhood in the way that they were for many people my age - in fact, for the longest time, the only Twilight flick I had seen was the final one, which I saw in the cinema in 2012 (I recognize that this is not the preferred viewing order). Anyways, I've been meaning to watch them all for a while, as they are such a culturally significant phenomenon and a big part of my generation's collective upbringing. Last week, we marathoned all five movies in one day, and after putting quite a bit of thought into it, this is my ranking of the Twilight films.

5. The Twilight Saga: Breaking Dawn - Part 1 (2011)

Starting out with a hot take, at least based on my fiancée's reaction (she had this one at #2). Based on roughly the first half of the fourth and final Twilight book, the penultimate Twilight film is a part of the source-material-splitting trend started by the final Harry Potter films - for better or for worse. I can't exactly judge this as an adaptation, as I have not read the novels by Stephanie Meyer, but even without reading the books, I can say that the decision to split Breaking Dawn into two movies had somewhat of a toll.

You see, the pacing in this film feels off. We spend half an hour following the wedding of Bella (Kristen Stewart) and Edward (Robert Pattinson), then another half an hour following their honeymoon, and it's over an hour into the movie that the plot really gets started. Once the final act rolls around, it feels rushed and a bit small-scale for the second-last instalment of the saga. In addition to the uneven pace, I also give minus points to both Breaking Dawn films for the f**ked-up nature of the Jacob-(Taylor Lautner)-imprinting-on-the-baby storyline - seriously, what the hell is up with that?

Granted, the Breaking Dawn movies are in many ways the 'cinematically best' out of the bunch, as the directing and production values are solid, and the young actors had improved a great deal in their acting performances. But, I won't give too much extra points for that, because of a very specific viewpoint: it's not like the better-made Twilight movies are exactly Oscar-winning quality, as the difference to the earlier films isn't that big, so the improvement almost hurts the films because they lose the lovable cruddiness of the first films.

I'd argue that a big part of why Twilight was such a culturally big phenomenon, and why people are so nostalgic for them, is the specific vibe created by the inconsistent acting, cringey dialogue and spectacularly unhinged editing choices in the first films - so while they're not cinematic masterpieces ripe for critical acclaim, they are very entertaining and largely what one expects from the Twilight saga. So that style is almost preferable to the slightly-more-cinematic-but-also-less-entertaining style of the last films, or at least on par with them due to different strengths and weaknesses.

4. The Twilight Saga: New Moon (2009)

Ah, speaking of the lovable cruddiness of the franchise's early films. The sophomore instalment was dead last both in Martta's ranking and the IMDB ratings of the films, and I can see why - from many viewpoints, it is a cinematic lowpoint for the saga (as cringey as the first film, before the franchise's production stepped up its game, but less impactful and iconic than its predecessor). The acting isn't very good yet, and the dialogue leaves a lot to be desired. But I'm still not putting New Moon last, because it does some things very right, and dammit if I didn't enjoy watching it more than Breaking Dawn: Part 1!

First of all, I like how this instalment puts a clear focus on the werewolf aspect of the lore. The first film is all about the vampires, with the wolves only being teased, whereas films 3-5 try to balance the two factions but with the wolves inevitably being in the shadow of the more highlighted vampires. But this flick is the werewolves' chance to shine, and it makes for some cool scenes and storylines. It's also a film where the saga's protagonist and best character Bella goes through a lot and has important character development, so points for that. Also some points for the sheer entertainment value of the "so bad it's good" factor in the two first films. Also, minus points for the random final act in Italy, which feels very "Oh shit, this story needs a final act, let's come up with, uh, something".

3. Twilight (2008)

The first film is a tough one to watch. It definitely gets the most generation-defining cult classic mileage out of the bunch - so much of what people in my generation know as the characteristics of the Twilight movies (the deep-blue filter, the wildly varying acting performances, the unintentionally hilarious dialogue) comes from this very first film. The style is very iconic in its own way - yes, a lot of it comes from the "so bad it's good" element, but it's not only that. Director Catherine Hardwicke did something very right for the movie to stand out of the crowd and become such a cultural phenomenon with its unique style, and she deserves recognition for that. Cult classics are still classics.

Also, story-wise, it is a decent introduction to this magical world - not mind-blowing or especially powerful to a viewer like me, but then again, 25-year-old men with balanced lives aren't the target audience. I can see how a film like this would absolutely mean the world to an angsty pre-teen girl, and they need their emotional support movies just like anyone else, so I really do respect the film for how well it clearly spoke to its target audience. It's no cinematic masterpiece, but it's objectively important and a cultural milestone.

2. The Twilight Saga: Breaking Dawn - Part 2 (2012)

Yeah, the last film slaps. Breaking Dawn - Part 2 is so hard to compare with the others in an unbiased manner, because of my strange viewing order of seeing this one first all those years ago. I had forgotten a lot during the years, but I remembered the big ending twist, and knowing that when watching these films through as a full saga for the first time couldn't help but dampen my experience a bit. But, that is obviously my fault for watching the last film all those years ago, so I won't fault the movies for it, and will try my best to imagine how it would've hit harder if I would've watched the movies the right way.

Anyhow, the ending twist itself is something that I've warmed up to. My original opinion, which in itself is an unfair assessment because I didn't have the context of the full saga, was that the 'the battle didn't really happen' reveal was anticlimactic and a lazy way out. I still kind of see that point, and understand why many fans do consider the twist a bit cheap - but that being said, I actually kind of like it. It's not quite up there with the greatest ending twists of all time, but I can't honestly think of a better way to end the saga, either. The meaning behind the twist does speak to my pacifist soul: ask yourself, how many real-life battles and wars would've been prevented if someone had shown the people making decisions how much death and loss they would cause (in general, or because of humanity's inherently selfish nature, particularly to their own side)? Quite many, I'd argue.

Furthermore, regardless of what you think of that twist, Breaking Dawn - Part 2 is an all-around decent final instalment. It doesn't cause the major emotional rush that some franchise finales do, but again, I didn't grow up with these films so I can't really expect that. The directing is at the franchise's best, as is the acting (following the growth of Kristen Stewart and Robert Pattinson's acting skills in real time via this marathon was a great joy), and the decent production doesn't make the film boring like it did Breaking Dawn - Part 1, simply because the story is so much more engaging and well-paced here. In Martta's ranking as well as the IMDB ratings, this one is at #1, and while my own opinion is slightly different, I can thoroughly see why.

1. The Twilight Saga: Eclipse (2010)

The scale of quality in this franchise is quite consistent, as even the worst films had many commendable qualities to them, while even the best ones are far from perfect with their share of flaws. For Eclipse, the franchise's third film and my personal favorite, my major criticisms are these: 1) it works better as an instalment in a franchise than as an individual film, meaning that it doesn't have as much of a personable style and movie identity to it than some of the films, and 2) the character Jacob is such an ass in this film that the major love triangle feels less like the triangle it's supposed to be, and more like a two-person love story and an annoying third person getting in the way due to the lack of understanding the word 'no' that seems to characterize the lives of so many men.

With the negatives out of the way, here's why the delightfully underrated Eclipse made it to the top of my list. First of all, it hits a sweet spot in the franchise's evolution - it still has a bit of the endearing cringe element that defined the first two films and was semi-gone from the last two, but it already has its share of the improved cinematic quality that defined the last two films, and was nowhere to be seen with the first two. Best of both worlds, one could say.

In addition, the film is paced well - in many of the other instalments, especially New Moon and Breaking Dawn - Part 2 (but also Twilight itself to some degree), the final act sticks out like a sore thumb, feeling like the movie is just vibes and character development for the first three quarters and then the writer has gone "Oh shit, we need a final act, uh, let's come up with something out of nowhere". In Eclipse, the film's endgame is built towards throughout the film, and when it arrives, it feels natural and properly climactic. Yes, the same can be said for Breaking Dawn - Part 2, but somehow, the slightly smaller-scale endgame seen here hit even harder for me.

Also, Eclipse was the most interesting out of the bunch for me as a fantasy nerd. I understand that the lore behind the creatures was never the main focus in these films as they would be in Godzilla films or Lovecraft novels, but hey, this is my ranking, and I care about that stuff when watching a fantasy movie even when the filmmaker's intended focus is on questions like 'Team Edward or Team Jacob?'*. So, the way this film takes a deep look at the backstories of its werewolf and vampire characters, as well as the loaded relationship between their cultures, following them being forced to work together despite their adversarial past and hostile attitudes - that's the shit right there.

*For the record, I see both love interests as deeply problematic due to Stephanie Meyer's lack of context on concepts like grooming, pedophilia and rape culture, and Bella Swan is an icon who deserves better than either of these hunks. That being said, team Edward. His love story with Bella is quite sweet if you manage to disregard the age difference implications, they have better chemistry, and Bella clearly has stronger feelings for him than for Jacob. Jacob has his moments, mostly when he's a wolf (honestly, he's so much more likable in wolf mode), but jeez, the guy can't take 'no' for an answer and his storyline has aged terribly from the lens of the post-#metoo era.

Thank you for reading! Tune in next week for a continuation of this fall's genre project: the top 15 fantasy movies of all time.

Ranking everything we watched in our 2024 Halloween marathon

Greetings, reader!

Last year, my girlfriend and I planned and executed a pretty epic movie marathon for Halloween, and I made a blog post ranking everything we watched. A year later, there was a glow-up on many levels - first of all, she's now my fiancée, and more importantly (kidding), this year's Halloween marathon came with an even cooler selection of what to watch, a more versatile line-up of snacks, and we invited a few friends to share the experience with us. Once again, I'm ranking everything included in the marathon - these are not ranked based on how good they are as overall movies / TV episodes / short films, but rather based on how good and important and memorable they were as parts of the overall marathon experience.

8. Terrifier (2016)

How good it is cinematically: 5/10

How scary it is: 7/10

How much fun I had watching it in the context of the marathon: 6/10

At how many minutes would my Mom give up if she were to watch this: 2 or 3

The third feature film that we watched in the marathon, Terrifier was, uh, interesting. I'm not a big fan of gore, and this flick ousted Hostel (2005) as the most disgusting gore flick I've seen. It's nice that the tapestry of films we watched made for a diverse dive into the subgenres of horror, but yeah, I definitely enjoyed this one the least.

7. After-School Special (2011)

How good it is cinematically: 7/10

How scary it is: 6/10

How much fun I had watching it in the context of the marathon: 6/10

At how many minutes would my Mom give up if she were to watch this: I reckon she'd watch the whole thing, but immediately regret it afterwards

One of the many strokes of genius from Martta (planning the contents and order of the marathon was her responsibility, as it was mine last year) was starting with a 10-minute short film to set the mood. After-School Special isn't horror in the conventional sense, but it is very uncomfortable and equipped with a shocking twist, so it did make for a neat prologue for what was to come.

6. Halloween 3: AwesomeLand (Modern Family, Season 6 Episode 6)

How good it is cinematically: 7/10

How scary it is: 2/10

How much fun I had watching it in the context of the marathon: 9/10

At how many minutes would my Mom give up if she were to watch this: This is the one thing she would watch fully and enjoy

Just like last year, we ended the whole thing with the cool-off of a Modern Family Halloween episode. It was a delightful change of pace after all the darkness and horror, and the episode is very funny.

5. Halloween IV: The Return of Michael Myers (1988)

How good it is cinematically: 6/10

How scary it is: 8/10

How much fun I had watching it in the context of the marathon: 8/10

At how many minutes would my Mom give up if she were to watch this: 15-20 (assuming you can somehow talk her into starting it in the first place)

Our marathon included the first two flicks of the Halloween franchise last year, so naturally we continued with flicks #3 and #4 this year (can't wait for the fifth and sixth ones in 2025!). This cruddy but enjoyable slasher sequel was made extra cruddy due to multiple technical difficulties, but that just made for a more authentic movie marathon feel - something always has to go wrong.

4. Halloween III: The Season of the Witch (1982)

How good it is cinematically: 4/10

How scary it is: 7/10

How much fun I had watching it in the context of the marathon: 11/10

At how many minutes would my Mom give up if she were to watch this: A solid half an hour (it takes a while before things get scary and gross)

Now, don't get me wrong, this deeply obscure Halloween instalment is a bad movie. But it was a great part of the marathon. It's not just bad - it's just that sweet right type of bad, and we had so much fun enjoying the cheesiness and laughing at it together. Also, there are some cool parts towards the end. But yeah, a good horror marathon needs one of these - no one wants to watch eight full-focus masterpieces in a row.

3. Salem's Lot (2024)

How good it is cinematically: 7/10

How scary it is: 8/10

How much fun I had watching it in the context of the marathon: 8/10

At how many minutes would my Mom give up if she were to watch this: Whenever the first kid goes missing

The first feature film in the marathon, completing the opening after the introductory short film, was this Stephen King adaptation from just this year. It wasn't perfect, but a very solid adaptation nonetheless, and the neat vampire-horror vibes were great for setting the mood and getting us properly locked in.

2. Hereditary (2018)

How good it is cinematically: 8/10

How scary it is: 9/10

How much fun I had watching it in the context of the marathon: Not sure if 'fun' can describe it, but I love how f**king tense we all were

At how many minutes would my Mom give up if she were to watch this: I doubt she'd last a minute

Ending on this (if you don't count the Modern Family cool-off) was a bold f**king move, but I gotta hand it to Martta - saving such an artistic and deeply anxiety-inducing piece of cinematic horror elegance for last was quite the powerful final act. After many films in a row of making light and cracking wise, this film had us rattled, unsettled and focused. Hell yes.

1. Ju-on: The Grudge (2002)

How good it is cinematically: 9/10

How scary it is: 10/10

How much fun I had watching it in the context of the marathon: 9/10

At how many minutes would my Mom give up if she were to watch this: Out of the house upon seeing the poster and/or trailer

Oh jeez. The Japanese know their shit when it comes to horror cinema. A part of me was disappointed that we didn't save this for the dark nighttime for maximum effect, but I get it - that might've been a bit too much. I take my horror flicks seriously (at least the ones that deserve to be taken seriously), and this masterpiece had me hooked, leaving a lasting impression.

Thank you for reading! Tune in next week as I continue this fall's genre project, with a ranking of my all-time top 15 fantasy movies.