Greetings, reader!
Over the years, I’ve strayed from my core teachings of movie/TV lists multiple times - I’ve done several editions of Music Month and Literature Month, as well as an individual case of Football Month. This time, I’m going further from my wheelhouse than ever before - in a realm in which I truly have no expertise, I’m doing a ”Culinary Month” just for the heck of it. In the first edition of this hilariously out-of-my-depth theme month, today’s post is all about the best types of coffee.
Drawing the distinctions between coffee drinks and deciding what I count as an individual variation was a difficult and arbitrary job, but I ended up creating a system that I can live with. Different espresso-based drinks are counted as their own separate items, regular filter coffee as a whole is counted as one individual, and the rather large swamp of iced coffees was divided into two wide-ranging subgenres that are counted as individuals here. Anyways, these are the best-ever coffee drinks in the view of this passionate caffeine enthusiast!
Here are my honorable mentions: Americano, Cafe Au Lait, Cold Brew, Irish Coffee, Pumpkin Spice Latte.
10. Red Eye
There are many variations of the Red Eye that I’ve come across, but the basic jist is this: it’s like an Americano, except that you replace the hot water with filter coffee. So, basically, you have your regular cup of joe, and then you add a shot of espresso. The end result is something so beautifully strong that it’ll feel shocking on a regular day - but if you’re tired and caffeine-deprived enough, a proper Red Eye feels magical.
I also count further ”Coffee x Coffee” variations under this one, such as the Black Eye (you make a cup by pouring filter coffee across an additional layer of coffee grounds), or my own concoction ”Coffee cubed”, in which you combine the two: 1) brew a regular cup of coffee, 2) pour that over some more coffee grounds for a stronger batch, and 3) drop the metaphorical grenade by mixing in a shot of espresso. Now that’ll wake you up!
9. Espresso
This classic of classics was hard to rank - on one hand, it’s the foundation of all the best coffee recipes out there and my life wouldn’t be the same without it, but on the other, if we’re comparing these as separate items, there’s no way around the fact that the taste of an espresso in itself isn’t quite as much to my enjoyment as many other coffee drinks.
Now, it’s definitely not bad - it’s just a very specific craving. Nine times out of ten, I’ll rather use a shot of espresso to make something further, but whenever that tenth time arrives, there’s nothing that’ll beat the original. Particularly as a pallet-cleanser after a big meal at a nice restaurant, this one (or its double variation, which I didn’t count separately for this list) hits the spot.
8. Macchiato
Some see this as a mere subgenre of the latte, or then of the espresso, but I chose to count it as its own thing. The term ‘Macchiato’ can mean a couple of different things depending on the coffee house, but traditionally, it refers either to an espresso with just a small dollop of steamed milk added, or to a latte with significantly less milk in relation to coffee (and at the end of the day, aren’t these two the same thing?).
In either case, one can rarely go wrong with one of these. It’s admirably strong, and it tastes great when made right.
7. Mocha
If you like both coffee and chocolate, you’re sure to love this delicious mixture. Many variations of the mocha exist, with elements like whipped cream, cinnamon and marshmallows sometimes entering the mix, but the foundation is always the same: whether it’s done via chocolate syrup or cocoa powder, the caffè mocha is the love child of espresso and hot chocolate.
The mocha is somewhat divisive as many traditional coffee enthusiasts consider it too sweet, which I get - but as someone with a big sweet tooth, I’ve always enjoyed the taste of this coffee variation. I don’t choose it out of a good selection all that often, but if I’m in the mood for both A) coffee and B) dessert in the same package, this classic is hard to beat.
6. Filter Coffee
In my initial version of the ranking, regular filter coffee was ranked a lot lower and outside the top ten. But, I looked at things from multiple points of view, and came to the conclusion that it needs to be higher. It may not taste quite as excellent or hit quite as hard as some other variations - but, being the type of coffee that I drink 9 times out of 10, I do have a great deal of love for it. Depending on which factors I emphasize the most on this list, filter coffee could be argued even for the #1 spot or at least the top three, but then again it would be a lot lower if this was purely a question of taste - so #6 is a decent compromise.
While my love for coffee has become a lot deeper after being introduced to various espresso-based concoctions, filter coffee will always be my first love when it comes to this world. It’s what I drink every morning at work, it’s what I dealt with when working as the coffee representative (a real title, and one that I came up with) of my student organization for two years, and it has been like a dear friend to me for about fifteen years now.
5. Latte
But dammit if the best espresso-based coffee drinks aren’t even better taste-wise!
A great example is this true classic of classics - the latte. This mixture of espresso and steamed milk tastes absolutely heavenly when made right, with the large proportion of milk making sure it’ll taste fun and go down easily while the strength of the espresso shot makes sure that it’s still strong and gets you properly caffeinated.
The exact blend of coffee and milk, as well as the style of preparing the milk, isn’t quite as refined as in some other coffee genres, which is why this isn’t ranked even higher - but then again, the simple approach gets the upside that this is super-easy to make at home! Ever since I got an AeroPress for Christmas from my Dad five years ago, a latte has been one of my most common go-to drinks to make with it (I make Americanos even more often, but that’s just because I’m lazy). And it works just as deliciously with oat milk or almond milk as the driving force!
4. Vietnamese
I’ve only been to a proper Vietnamese-style café once, and I don’t remember the name of the specific type of coffee that I had - I just remember that it was one of the very best coffees that I’ve ever consumed, and completely different from anything else I’ve tasted. It was in this small café, run by actual Vietnamese people, in the city of Savonlinna out of all places, and oh man - as I recall, it was wonderfully strong and delicately sweet all at once. Gotta have more of this stuff whenever I get the chance!
3. Iced Coffee
It would’ve felt weird and over-bloated to count all types of iced coffees separately, or to draw the line in some arbitrary place (do I separate frappés from frappuccinos, what about the caramel and/or vanilla and/or chocolate versions of otherwise similar established iced coffees, etc.) - so the most logical distinction seemed to be dividing cold coffees into two main groups. The water-based cold brews were counted as one and made it into the honorable mentions, where as the milk-based ones (also counting the wonderful vegan coffees where the milk is substituted with oat milk or almond milk) are lumped together here at #3.
I love me a good iced coffee, especially if it’s a hot summer day. Ranging from the simple yet elegant iced lattes all the way to zany concoctions like caramel mochaccinos and my own personal invention “Makea Kaveri” (ingredients: oat milk, triple shot of room temperature espresso, Baileys, sugar and caramel syrup), these drinks feel like the best thing in the world when the right moment comes.
2. Cappuccino
This is the Godfather of coffee drinks right here. This Italian invention has enriched coffee culture in a spectacular fashion, and given coffee enthusiasts like myself one of the best-ever options to order in any given café. The combination of espresso, steamed milk and the milk foam layer, especially when made in the lore-accurate 1/3 of each -proportions, is just so damn delicious - it feels like a treat, but beneath the layers of taste, it also feels like coffee (opposed to some espresso-based beverages that might taste good but stray so far from the core tenets that they don't quite give you the sensation that coffee is supposed to).
1. Flat White
God bless that barista from New Zealand or Australia (the mythology is a bit unclear and debated on this one) who came up with this f**king masterpiece. With a higher ratio of espresso to to milk than in a latte, and served without the thick foam layer of a cappuccino but a delicate microfoam instead, this drink (when made by a barista who knows their shit) tastes like coffee in its ultimate, final form.
When in a proper café, I've noticed time and again that this item on the menu will inevitably be even more to my liking than any cappuccino, mocha or pretty much anything else. There's just something magical about the taste, texture, aftertaste and caffeine effect in a good flat white that can't be beaten.
Thank you for reading! Tune in next week as I continue Culinary Month with a ranking of my favorite whiskeys.
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